Disclaimer Required

I'm going to preface this (entirely late) update with a disclaimer. For unknown reasons (read: coffee at 10:00pm) I managed to toss and turn my way through a colossal 2 hours of sleep last night. As a result, I'm barely lucid. Combine this with hours in front of the computer doing nothing important and a 2 hour bike ride around campus to clear my head, I'm getting that panicky edge of extreme exhaustion. I'm trying to turn that 'edge' to a good purpose in updating you all on my past 10 days or so.

During the time in Beijing I've had to experience a LOT of cultural and social adjustments to living on my own, living on campus, learning another language and being in a foreign nation.

I've spoken to cab drivers in mandarin while they reply in English (with some semblance of understanding hopefully passing through the mishmash of poor language skills).

I've been told that 'Oh! You're from Canada? I have heard that you have REALLY good Kebabs there..' How's that for a stereotype.

I've eaten ox spinal cord, entire fish (sans viscera), boiled meat (Hot Pot is a new found addiction), black fungus (mushrooms that more closely resemble firm seaweed), a pot of hot chopped hot chilies with a few slivers of beef, unidentifiable skewers of meat from streetside vendors for $0.10 CAD apiece and the occasional banana.

I've drank gallons of beer I can barely stand the smell of at home, smoked a few very terrible Chinese cigarettes and cigars, enjoyed a decent hookah or two with some friends at the local college pubs and found out what 'fake' (illegally distilled, methanol-heavy) vodka and spirits does to the body. I've learned that waking up at noon facing the wrong way in your bed with your shoes on and feet on your pillow is a really awful way to realize that you don't really remember anything of the previous evening. I've done it again that same night after a hot shower, a breakfast at the local pub and previously made plans with a big group of people I couldn't in good conscience change.

I've turned down drugs. I've thought about enjoying them, then realized that I have an addictive personality and that the punishments are far too severe should I be caught.

I've ridden a bicycle more in 1 month than in the previous 10 years. I've walked more than in the past 2 years. I've learned that 'cold' is subjective, and that wearing shorts and a tee-shirt in Beijing on an overcast day at 14 degrees will get you even more strange looks than merely being a brighter shade of human.

I've learned to 'deal' with being a minority and being laughed at for being another color and ethnicity. I've not returned that particular favor out of consideration for the way it can make you feel.

I've seen toddlers defecate on the floor of a crowded mall with no one making any effort to stop them. I've also seen a dozen kids having the time of their life riding a single, rickety old bike in the concrete courtyard of run down apartment complex a few km away from campus. I kicked myself both times for not sucking it up and bringing my 'heavy' camera with me.

I've decided that actually trying to find something identifiable to eat is no longer a hassle I can deal with. Point and pray is a new way of life for me. I will no longer be afraid of Canadian food that is called 'spicey'. That's a misnomer.

I've been offered tea in a poorer part of town by a very pleasant older couple just pouring two cups of tea outside their tiny, crumbling brick room. I had enough Chinese to thank them and introduce myself, but not to understand what they were saying in return.

I've learned how incredibly easy it is to communicate with nothing but a smile and a nod of your head.

I've also learned that not knowing how to ask 'do you have toilet paper for sale' can be among the most frustrating moments I've ever suffered.

I've had some awesome times with people I never would have thought could be friends.

I've been so bored and lonely that I've just gone outside and watched people because I ran out of things to amuse me on the internet.

I've had fun. I've been so frustrated it's nearly brought me to tears. I've experienced more loneliness in 1 month than in 22 years previous.

I've questioned where my life is headed. I've replanned what the next 10 years of my life might look like a dozen times and can't decide on how I'm going to balance my life, my goals and the need for money.

I've budgeted. I've scrimped and saved on stupid petty things and I've spent 700元 on beer and concert tickets at the drop of a hat because I didn't have anything else to do. I've kept a daily running tally and budget that lets me know how much money I have to spend every day before I leave.

I've ignored that budget when it's inconvenient, only to realize that I have the resources, capability and support (thanks Mom and Dad) to bounce back from any financial setbacks that this 'experience of a lifetime' might cause me.

I've run out of energy to continue this stream of consciousness. It's interesting for me too, though I'm not going to go back and read what I wrote. It's more fun if it's unedited.

P.S.: I had a couple tests. I got 98% on the listening and 99% on the comprehensive. They weren't big tests, more so 'big' quizzes. Still, it makes me wonder just how much I'm going to be getting out of these classes.

Hope everyone is well. I'm going to reply to any e-mails that I've neglected right now.

Regards,

Nathan